My Biggest Regret

 I gotta be a little blunt and gross but this blog came to mind while sitting on my toilet seat (I usually do most of my profound thinking on that mighty seat). There I was reading my dose of rage comics (YES! iPhone app, rage comics!) and I saw one that compelled me to write and share one of my biggest regrets *tear jerker moment*

no... this isn't going to be a sappy post about some lost love, beautiful boy, or some gaudy thing I did in god knows where.. maybe Amsterdam (haven't been there yet.. but I'm sure I will have a regretful story when I do LMAO wtf jk!)

This post is dedicated to my late best friend

Bloody hell i only had this photo saved on this lame netbook...!! forgive me! 

For anybody who is somebody, you should know his sweet little face as Dino :)

I got him when I was just a child, sometime after landing in Canada and moving to Newmill Crescent, somewhere in the asian lands of Richmond Hill. He was an electrifying addition to our lives; a little psycho, a little dumb, and absolutely crazy over us!

The saddest part is that growing up with him as a child gives me little memories of him as a puppy. I can't imagine how small he must have been. As I grew bigger, so did he. But anyway, I loved him in every way possible. I would have loved him more if he would sit still in my play-baby carriages LOL poor dog.

As I grew older, he was just another member of the family to me. Had he been a new puppy, I would have fawned over him a lot more I suppose. Although I like to believe that I treated him the best in my family, I wish I took more photos of him and spent more time with him. But of course, I tried. I took him out when others wouldn't. I walked him for hours and carried him home thinking his short little legs must have been tired. I let him have a go at my finger one time (my finger got a bloody hole!) to stop him from eating a random chicken bone found on the floor! (who throws out chicken bones on the ground in public!!). My point is, I think I did a lot for him (Or I mean I've convinced myself that I have), as much as I could, as a teenager. I went out lots and wasn't home often, but when I was, he was always catching my attention.

I don't know if it's because I don't have any memories of myself before highschool with Dino, but anyway, I feel like I began to pay more and more attention to him as I went from middle school to high school, and then to university. It was in university that my sweetest dog went from getting my attention to getting my concern. Sure, he was still cute, and doing things like stealing my pillow (Cute story which I think I share one too many times), but he was growing older and weaker. I always avoided talking about the inevitable with my parents. When talk about him came up during dinner, I became glazed over and stoney eyed. I even became angry.. omg.. what an arrogant person I am haha.

The nightmare arrived in February. This is where my biggest regret lies. I came home late one night - all the lights were closed, and there was my sweet old friend lying on my pillow in his corner of the kitchen. He was tired; I didn't know whether he was awake. Every night before I slept I would come and pet his small head to let him know how much he was loved. But on this forsaken night, I decided not to - I don't want to wake him, and it's late. The next morning I woke up for work, and he was gone. My mom was holding him in the kitchen, crying and I didn't have the courage to go up to him until sometime later.

My parents comfort me time to time, telling me that he had waited until I was home before he left. He was a dumb dog I said? No, he only acted dumb to trick us. He was the smartest dog ever and so I believe my parents are right. However, I think about him all the time and wish I had just patted his head a little. Maybe given his chin a little scratch? Rubbed his balding belly or put his tiny little face next to mine and given him a little peck. But I didn't. Every time I remember this, I give a little message to Dino wherever he is, hoping and praying that he knows I loved him and always would.

Aw, writing this blog makes me really sad. He wasn't just a dog (for all you soulless people who might read this and say so). He was my brother; my best friend.

I guess I'm just saying, don't take people or things for granted. You really don't realize all the things you haven't done for them, until it is too late to do it. So be a little less selfish, and think about them. Love them, help them, and be there for them and with them!